Client Poem: I Write – by Sonam Hajela

I write
Behind my eyes
The broken lines
And the broken yesterdays
And all tomorrows
Given away
Before I had any purchase
Something snaps
Something fragile
The dust and smoke rise up
From the fragmented pieces
Swirling in the sunlit spaces
Rising higher
Away from me
Just like everything I ever
Reached for
In vain
And can’t say
For they’re bigger than me and my
Fruitless words
Tripping in their power
Wanting that which has no name
Needing that which can’t be had
Locked away behind doors
To which I have no keys
Only windows to reveal
They tease and taunt
Close but no cigar,
They say.
That which does not kill you
Makes you stronger,
They say.
Well, every new thought
Is like a gun aimed at my heart
With my finger on the trigger
My heart bleeds
Leaking from my fingertips
From my eyes,
Down my face
The eyes that I can’t face in the mirror
The eyes that ask how much longer
I’m running out of air.

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