Client Journal: I’m unlovable is this really true?

Often we believe we are unlovable because our parents were not able to love us in ways that made us feel that we are worthy.  We energetically take on and internalize their limitations, beliefs and wounds and start to diminish our uniqueness in the world; our right to freedom and love.  In truth we are lovable for purely being.  Of course we can act unlovable to create a self fulfilling prophecy.. but deep down our soul is a light that can attract abundance and creative ingenuity.

Client beliefs
I am realizing that I usually ask a guy how he feels about me after we have slept together…my victim surfaces, seeking approval and validation (through sex) and then collapsing when it doesn’t work out. When I get rejected, I accept it without telling the guy how I feel.

Guidance: Your statements give you the answer as to who you are with men….does desperate victim ring a bell? It is good to cry and take care of the victim child… and you need to realize how desperate for love the little girl is that she would give herself away and treat herself so poorly. It is good you finally spoke up for yourself… but now you need to change the pattern… and that takes you rebuilding and healing your self esteem…tap on seeing and feeling the child…loving her in her imperfect being as lovable.

Tapping on sad child

Client M: This unlovable belief is a huge piece for me. Over the past couple of days, I have been doing the tapping while saying, “I love you M. I love you when you are sad, I love you when you are happy, I love when you succeed, I love you when you make mistakes.”  When I do this, I feel happier, and more self accepting. You are right, it is important to acknowledge and love the negative aspects about myself as well as the positive ones. By saying to myself that I love myself even when I am sad and hurting, it takes the pressure off me trying to be “perfect”. It gives me a ray of hope. Hope that one day, I won’t care about being perfect, I will just be happy.

** Tapping is an Emotional Freedom Training (EFT) process that activates energy points in the body to relieve trauma, limited beliefs and other stress related or non-productive behavior.