What
What did you say?
I hate her?
I resent her?
How awful.
Am I that awful?
How do you know this?
This is my secret.
Who told you?
This is hard to receive.
I might explode or disappear if I do.
But wait
I already explode and disappear
This part of me makes me invisible.
How awful.
A bad mother.
Resent that beautiful baby.
Resent giving and giving and giving.
How unChristian.
God will be very mad at me.
I have to keep this a secret.
What
What did you say?
He/She already knows.
It is OK.
Most mothers have these feelings
And they will not fess up.
They bury it.
They numb it.
They go to sleep.
Pills.
Food.
Alcohol.
Self –hatred.
I am not alone?
I can wake up to this nightmare
And be alright?
What.
What is that you say?
WAKE UP.
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