The Telling 2015

Telling my story and dancing my story was so huge for me! It was scary, I felt anxious, but watching my video I also felt a lot of compassion for my inner little girl, a lot of strength for myself for being vulnerable, and sadness that I hid myself in shame for so long. This performance was the first time I cried while performing, and it was also the first time I really felt the energy of the audience receiving the piece. Usually when I’m dancing/performing, I am stepping into a world that doesn’t really exist for me. But this performance I was sharing a piece of myself, and I was being myself. It felt amazing! That connectedness is something I want to expand on and always have with me when I am dancing.

Participating in The Telling was a life changing experience. After more than forty years, my secret was out, I shared my truth! A very liberating experience indeed! The process of getting to my truth was a journey, and participating in The Telling was the catalyst for releasing the shame that I kept suppressed for so many years. My abuse was my biggest secret, no one could know yet the results of my abuse showed up everywhere. Now, I no longer hide my abuse, the secret is out, the shame has been released, and the healing has begun!

Being a part of The Telling was very much like landing on a mysterious island and not being sure what would exist, and what I might see. I came into this with blinders on, and slowly as the cover lifted, what was revealed to me was a beautiful place of honest communication, laughter, tears, healing, and love, love, love and more love. The emotional creature inside me was nourished, the insecurities squashed like an ugly spider, and the artist allowed to paint with brilliant bright colors. The feminine was home, at last. The Telling was a game changer, no, a life changer. It opened my heart up to relationships with others, and most importantly the relationship and care I give to myself.

Being a part of The Telling was an amazing, transformative, and therapeutic experience for me on so many levels. I have been in so much shame about the things I have gone through in my life and doing this has broken through some of that shame. What I went through is a part of who I am now and it’s nothing to be ashamed about. The abuse I went through as a child put in my head that I was not worth being loved and the different abuses I went through as a teenager reinforced that. I have been acting and behaving as if I don’t deserve love because of what happened to me. Through working with Marta and doing The Telling I was able to see that. Also seeing those men who loved, respected and supported their wives despite the abuse made me see that I can be loved despite what happened. I do deserve it. It helped me take it in on another level.

We can’t thank you enough for all you have done to help our agency and the girls we serve. I have heard so many rave reviews of the April 10th production and Stacey credits its success to all your hard work and sincere passion. You have done an amazing job “giving voice” to such an important segment of our population and further empowering their recovery!